Roach Sighting

We opened a drawer tonight to find a cockroach and a few of its friends stirring about. They were all been immediately slaughtered...

To send a message.

Casey wrote this, not Andy.

Landslide

One night over the summer I decided to make a cover of Landslide by Fleetwood Mac. I thought I'd upload it. It's pretty cheesy.

Click Here To Download MP3

Count Down To "Steal Yr Face"

Tonight I went and picked up what will soon be the largest painting hanging in our apartment. Not only will it be the largest painting in 3L, but it will also be the largest that I personally have ever shared a home with. I refer to the future because currently the painting resides within a large cardboard tube located in the kitchen. It's in such a state because our friend Luke, who painted it and was nice enough to give it to us, had taken it off of its frame and rolled it up for storage purposes. We will not be able to hang the painting, which is called Steal Yr Face, until we build a new frame for it so that he can come over and re-stretch the canvas. Here is a little sneak peak of Steal Yr Face, the dimensions are six by six feet (we barely have a wall that can fit the whole thing):


Hopefully it will be up by the end of this weekend and we can upload some photos of it hanging in our small living room!

Don't Tread On Me

"Hello," I said.

It was Irene, my landlord, entering the building this afternoon.

"Hello," was the response.  I held the inner door for her while she held the outer door for me.

Why was she coming in?  Was she going to check on the construction on the third floor?  What if she was going to knock on my door?  No, then she would have said something to me.

Thermos Mishap

Yesterday I left our apartment with the intention of buying a high-grade thermos. I'm getting up a little before dawn later this week to go into Manhattan and help videotape my employer look for dead birds that have flown into the buildings overnight (more on this later) and I thought it would be a good idea to bring along a thermos of coffee. Plus, having a thermos just seemed like a smart idea. I walked on over to Zaya's Appliance Store which turned out to be having a huge sale so instead of leaving with a thermos I left with everything in the store!

I seriously left with the whole store instead of buying a thermos! I told Zaya right to his face, "You think I give a damn about this thermos anymore? I want the whole fucking store! Wrap it up, package it, put it in a bag, tie pathetic little piece of twine around it and hand it over because now I got some shit to take care of!"

When I got back to the apartment I realized that I didn't actually purchase everything in the store. It turns out I only got exactly what I went there for, which was the Stanley 24OZ. Classic Vacuum Food Jar. Here's a picture:

Here's a picture of it being used that I took from the Stanley website, the picture file was labeled man-pour.gif:


Ha ha ha, man-pour. Soon that will be me. Here's some information on the thermos:

"The Stanley® Classic Food Jar is the ultimate in durability. Double wall stainless steel unbreakable vacuum insulation will keep coffee or soup hot all day long, day after day. The Classic Food Jar has a stainless steel lid that can be used as a bowl, a wide mouth opening, a heavy duty handle and a rust-proof finish. Every Stanley® is backed by a lifetime guarantee."

Features:

• Double Wall Stainless Steel Vacuum Insulation
• Durable Rust Proof Finish
• Wide-Mouth Opening
• 12oz. Lid Doubles as Bowl
• Lifetime Warranty
• Leak Proof

Jealous?

Watch Out Late-Night Ladies

I currently make my income by logging tapes for a documentary on the subject of light pollution (as in pollution caused by excessive lighting). I hope to post more about this experience as time goes on but for now I'd like to share an interesting and unexpected piece of information. While logging an interview of a scientist with a PhD in breast cancer research I learned that women who do shift work (work nights and at other unusual times) are fifty to one hundred percent more likely to develop breast cancer than women who don't. The studies that show this are "remarkably consistent" and because of this shift working has been upgraded to the status of a Probable Carcinogen.

It is possible that the cause of this stems from the hormone that is released when your eye is exposed to artificial light.

I apologize for not being able to explain this in more detail or link specific studies.

A Brief History of the Palace and a History of How I Came to Know That History

A couple weeks ago, while passing by the bar, Dan was pulled aside by Irene to chat, as we so often are when we pass by that bar. This occasion was when Irene mentioned that the building is protected by the city as a historic landmark. Talking to Dan later, I learned that the wooden shingles on the facade, which can be seen here, were given as evidence of 156's historical relevance.

"What were these shingles about?" I wondered. Doing some preliminary research on a real estate site I learned that the building was built in 1930 and is valued at a dollar amount far lower than our rent would suggest. This information, at least the former piece, turned out to be a gross inaccuracy. My friends, don't trust the Internet.

Later, on said Internet, I found a digital scan of the "Greenpoint Historic District Designation Report," all 92 pages of it, approved by then mayor Edward I. Koch. I scrolled through it, stopping every few pages to read something of the history of the neighborhood, until I came upon a passage, which I quote now in full. The history of 156 Calyer:

"No. 156 is a four-story frame flathouse built about 1880 for James Youngs, a builder, who also erected No. 154 about eight years earlier. The first floor probably was always used for commercial purposes but now the storefront has contemporary brick facing. The three upper floors are residential and clad in novelty shingles, a feature associated with the Queen Anne style. This was a popular facade material for frame buildings at the time the building was erected. There are two other fine examples of this sheathing material at 109 and 126 Noble Street. Here, the shingles are cut in two ways: a straight edge and a scalloped or fish-scale edge. The fish-scale is used to emphasize the floor divisions and the spaces between the windows. The windows are square-headed and enframed by architrave moldings and brackets that carry continuous hooded lintels. The roof cornice has been removed but the parapet has been sympathetically covered with modern wooden shingles. The Lorimer Street facade presents a dramatic and largely intact expanse of the shingle siding. The treatment is similar to the main facade but a shallow three-sided oriel on wooden brackets rises at the center from the second floor. This oriel is flanked by windows. At the rear of the ground floor is an intact, original entrance to the flats on the upper floors."

In the future this post will be re-titled, "Dry & Anti-climactic."

Show Your Love

I'd like to request that everyone who reads this blog declare it so by adding themselves to our "Readers" section. If we get more than 10 people up in there then the section name will be changed from "Readers" to something more exciting. It's support from our friends that will keep this blog going through its second week of existence.

Tune in tomorrow for the one week anniversary celebration post!

Last week at our local corner store, God Bless Deli Grocery, I spotted actress and comedienne Janeane Garofalo.

She entered with a younger tall dark male companion and stood in line at the counter.

I didn't stick around long enough to find out what she wanted at the counter, but perhaps:

A) Cigarettes

B) Directions

C) $2.50 Cheeseburger

3L is now wondering if she may be another Greenpoint dweller.

The Loud Sound

I heard a very loud sound. It sounded like an engine revving just once. Then there was silence.

It's three minutes later now. The engine has just revved twice more. Three more times. Two more times. Just one extended revving. It is accompanied by the sounds of Polish laughter.

Three more minutes have passed. One quick one. Bring it on!

HISTORIC

Foreign Space Journey

Prior to making the pasta mentioned in the previous post Dan, Eamon, and I improvised a song. It's called, "Foreign Space Journey." It was recorded in my room with the external microphone on a Sony Cassette-Corder TMC-929. Andy took some pictures. Maybe he'll post them later!

Click Here To Download MP3

Last Night (October 10, 2008)

1) Made pasta with my pal Eamon. Lots and lots of mushrooms and onions. We were The Basil Brothers.

2) Birthday party at the Charleston (bar). Was not feelin' it. Too loud, couldn't hear my friends.

3) Turkey's Nest (bar). Bottle of beer for $3.00 or 32 ounce Styrofoam cup of beer for $3.50. Andy and Eamon used the womens restroom with ease. Dan used the womens restroom and someone scolded him because he obviously was not a "Turkette."

4) Spacious bar with bowling alley in it. Cement floor, seemed like a garage. Very neat place. This picture was taken of Eamon after he said he wanted to dance:


5) Snuck into Polish night club seeking dancing. Avoided $15.00 dollar cover by going up emergency side entrance. Danced a lot. Stood out by being only the four guys who didn't have some stranger rubbing her ass all over our junk. Attempts were made by Eamon to dance with girls. No success except for one partial in which the girl said she would like to dance but she was with her mom and it would be weird. Eamon was asked to move so that a very large black man could sit down and have his girl work her stuff on him. The man was tired of standing. Tried to leave by going out the emergency door we came in through. Got yelled at and told to use the normal entrance.

6) Returned to apartment around 2:30AM to find that Life on Mars was still shooting. Talked to the extras for a while. They were very nice. Met a guy named Tim who told me wild stories about the teamsters in Boston secretly controlling the industry. Eamon really wanted to go upstairs so I gave him my keys. He said he had to go to bed. His parting words were, "Goodnight f*ggotron." The extras may or may not have heard him. He was immediately overcome with guilt.

7) Eamon went to sleep on two arm chairs pushed together. Watched Late Night with Conan O'Brien with Andy and Dan. Went to bed.

This post's name will be changed to: Eamon's Night Out

Movie Magic!

On Friday the guys in this photo and many others not pictured spent almost 12 hours transforming the social club into a big time movie set for a scene for an upcoming episode of the new television series Life on Mars. 12 hours, one scene, TV.

Grips, I call them illusionists! Like 20 David Blaines running around here all day. It was beautiful. Really, they did a gorgeous job.

Time Warner Guy

I wake up to Andy strolling into my room like it's nobody's fucking business. Close behind him is a large hat-wearing Hispanic man with an identification card hung around his neck and a tool box in his left hand.

"Time Warner is here to install the Internet," Andy says. My head moves from Andy to the man looming behind him. He extends his hand.

"Hey man, how's it going?"

"I'm good, how are you?"

He is well.

Andy and I retreat to the living room which joins my bedroom. We watch Seinfeld as the cable guy begins hammering a cord along the wall. Everything is fine. Soon we will have the Internet.

Suddenly, emitting from my computer is the strangely familiar sound of a drum being struck. I hear it once, the second hit is cut off by the cable guy pressing the mute key. I quickly realize this sound is so familiar because it is part of the drum-only soundtrack to a silly pornographic art film I shot and edited for my friend (porn in art projects is still going on apparently). I jerk my head around to see the cable guy who is now sitting at my computer franticly closing windows, pressing keys, and moving the mouse around. He looks at me briefly and then looks back at the computer screen which is out of my view.

I sit nervously not knowing what to do. Is he really watching what I think he is, or am I just paranoid? Seinfeld is no longer funny because there is a stranger fifteen feet away who might be watching the only art-porn I've ever been involved in making. Andy is unaware of what is happening, he makes conversation that I can barely respond to.

I realize I am not wearing a shirt. "I better put a shirt on," I say as an excuse to get a look at the computer screen. I walk over and see that this snooping piece of shit is in fact watching the art-porn. Without turning around he hides the movie window. I look away just as he turns around to locate me in the room. I know what he is thinking: does this shirtless twenty-something know I am watching his porno flick?

Of course I know you're watching it you fucker... And it's not mine. It was a friend's project! I swear!

I return to the living room and sit, waiting for him to leave. He starts laughing.

"Aww shit!" I hear. He takes out his walkie talking and begins speaking very loudly, in Spanish, to a woman on the other end. He speaks enthusiastically, like he can't even believe what he's seeing. I try to follow along but he is speaking to quickly for me to understand what he's saying. The conversation goes on for two minutes. He says goodbye to the woman on the other end. The woman who I'm sure now thinks the cable Internet subscriber at 156 Calyer Street is a pervert. Or at least a very unoriginal art student.

Time passes and the cable guy says he is finished. We thank him. He leaves.

I go to my computer to find the art-porn hidden from the finder, but still open. The cable guy must have forgotten to close it.

Nice!

Hey now now now, my main man Big Bee comin' here and representing it real hard with The 3L Doctrine -- straight from his heart to his mouth. All I know is I wanna to get the...

Get the...

Get the...

Get the...

Get the fabulous D.E. (The Dazed Euthanist) out here to join in with me and say, "Yo banana boy!" There's truth to that.

Yo Banana Boy!
Yo Banana Boy!
Yo Banana Boy!

(We wanna keep it easy and we wanna keep it consistent.) Here's what Big Bee is up to:

3L IS JUST A SHELL
FROM WHICH WE BROADCAST
FORTH
TO TELL Y'ALL HOW WE FEEL
ABOUT THE GLOBAL CONDITION
A FUCKED UP SITUATION
THIS EARTH CANNOT BE REAL
IT MUST BE A FACSIMILE
PRODUCED BY COMPUTER IMAGERY
FOR OUR CONSUMPTION IT'S LIKE SYNERGY
I'M FEELIN' LIKE YOU'RE FEELIN' ME
BUT IF NOT LET ME BREAK IT DOWN LIKE THE DISTILLERY
WE MAKE THE EARTH
GOD SOWS THE SEED
WE TILL THE SOIL AND BURN THE WEEDS
UNTIL OUR BIRTH WE ARE FREE
WE ARE OUR OWN MOTHERS
WE HAVE NO OTHER BROTHERS
OR SISTERS
MISTERS, THIS IS THE 3L DOCTRINE

Here We Are

Welcome to

the real

show.